When walking away is winning

Aha moment!  I remember years ago when the Weigh Down diet became popular. I had some friends that immediately lost so much weight, you could literally see them melting.; After reading the book, and watching the videos I was so frustrated I had not lost a single pound. I would seek them out, desperate to figure out what the secret was,“how are you doing it?” My friends seemed confused by my question. They would tell me in a blasé kind of way,to  just submit, or to simply wait for hunger to eat and only eat what I need. Not to be sarcastic but, THANKS A LOT! I had never heard that before. My question wasn’t “can you quote me what the book say?"; my question was how you are making it work? I had literally been trying for 3 years to eat only what I needed, however my head, stomach and metabolism seemed to all disagree on just what that amount was. 10 years have gone by since then and I have worked through this question, wrestling to understand the power of my brain and emotions have over my desire to live in freedom; I am beginning to get some clarity. Some foods for me are much like alcohol for an alcoholic;once I start it is close to impossible for me to stop. It’s just not worth having that food in my life and fighting to stay away from it every day. For me it's like a credit card. If I have it I must use it. If it's gone, I don't think about it and make better choices. I talk a lot about not using diets to control things in your life; however, It’s not a diet for me to stay away from foods that are addictive for me, it’s smart! The term diet in my dictionary is a defined as a pre-prescribed way of eating that someone else writes to help you lose weight. I don't care who tries to call it a lifestyle choice; if it comes with a list of recipes and meal plans, it's a diet. You might think I'm splitting hears but the difference is the motive behind the change. Do I just want to lose weight, or do I want to live in freedom. My motive is not to cut out certain foods for a quick weight loss; it's to learn what triggers my compulsions and what doesn’t. When I stay away from the foods that are an addiction for me, I find myself much more easily waiting for my body to signal me it’s time to eat. I also find that I can keep my mind on the people I am with or the things I am doing and not obsessing over what’s left on my plate, or how many calories I have left today. The food is not longer the focus. The day may come that I am strong enough to add some of those things back into my life, but I am OK either way. Walking away in this case is winning.